Have you noticed that the ages of “older people” keep getting older. When I was 17, I thought anyone over 30 was “old.” When I was 30, anyone over 50 was “old.” Now, you must be over 80 for me to think you’re “old.” Will I ever think I’m “old”? I may be getting close.
When I was about age 45, I did some calculating and decided to retire at 56. Now that I’m six years into retirement, I wish I had considered a lot more than money. Goals, for example. My only goal was to retire and have a lot of fun. I actually thought goals would be counterproductive to the fun I anticipated. There are many things I wish I had known before I retired. Through some research, and trial and error, I discovered some simple principles and practices that have brought joy and happiness in retirement.
If you’re not yet retired, my advice is to retire sooner, rather than later. I found I didn’t need as much money as I thought. After getting out of debt, creating some savings, contributing towards a pension, and reducing my living expenses, I took the dive into retirement.
Suddenly, I had more disposable income than ever before. With investments, pension, and reduced taxes, I began to believe what the bank was telling me, “You’re richer than you think.” Some enjoyable part-time work (two half days a week) I took on gave me more “fun money.”
As a teacher for 30 years, I enjoyed challenging, but meaningful work. In retirement that work was replaced with a lot of fun and pleasure. Most of the first year of my retirement was spent travelling. Each trip provided the fun I was looking for, however, there was an emptiness afterward. The happiness didn’t last, and I found myself struggling to figure out what was next. Why I wasn’t happier? How can happiness be longer lasting?
Positive psychology provides some simple answers. The research tells us that lasting happiness, or fulfillment and joy, comes from purpose and meaning. Retired life was indeed fun but there wasn’t much that was meaningful. The following practices helped me create meaning and the lasting happiness I was looking for.
Practice No. 1 – Care for yourself.
This may seem obvious, but when we focus on relaxation and recreation, nutrition and exercise often go out the window. Walking every day really helped my physical and emotional wellness.
Positive psychology suggests that to feel happy we need to consider all aspects of wellness, including physical, social, emotional, intellectual and spiritual. Think of practices that will help you in each of these areas. For example, reading, journalling, praying, meditating, spending time in nature or thinking of what you’re grateful for.
Practice No. 2 – Consciously connect with significant others.
What is meaningful in your life? Studies show that most people think of relationships when asked this. Consider spending more time and energy on important relationships and you’ll probably get a lot back.
My wife and I decided that we would go out and do something fun at least once a week, usually on Friday night. We also set a goal of spending time with a grandchild each week. After their school day, we would take them out on an activity of their choice and usually get something to eat.
I made a conscious effort to connect more with friends. Usually, we would go for lunch. My core group of childhood friends and I, along with our partners, meet for an evening periodically. Retirement gave me the time to make meaningful connections with those who are significant in my life.
Practice No. 3 – Continue to improve and grow.
Consider the knowledge, skills and talents you would like to further develop. Personal development and self-determination create lasting happiness.
My research on happiness was self-fulfilling. It was ironic that I was learning and writing about what makes us happier and got happier as I did it! The research tells us that we’re happier when we’re productive and improving ourselves.
To improve and grow can be working on skills and talents that fit with our hobbies and interests. Reading non-fiction, playing a sport (my friends love pickleball and I still love to ski), making crafts and working on home repairs are a few of the endless opportunities. In the first year of my retirement, I was not focused on being productive or improving myself. Now I know I need to improve and grow to be happy!
Practice No. 4 – Give to others.
Consider serving others, volunteering and being generous without expecting anything in return. Evidence shows that helping others can increase feelings of happiness and satisfaction. Do good, be good and feel good.
I decided to volunteer one afternoon a week with struggling students. It felt so rewarding to give back. My volunteer work reminded me of the meaning and fulfillment I’d valued during my teaching career. I also got more involved with serving in my church and I made myself available to assist a few people in need. Volunteering has become a real source of joy in my life.
Practice No. 5 – Create some retirement goals.
Consider what makes you happy. Do you want to travel, pursue recreation, work, spend time with family, develop interests and hobbies, downsize, move or do volunteer work? These will more likely happen when you make a conscious choice to do them.
To be happy in retirement I realized I needed more concrete goals than travel and fun. I found that the practices I’ve listed above didn’t happen without intentional goals in each area. You will find lasting happiness if you set goals in each area and review them regularly. Positive psychology and my own anecdotal experience teach us that adopting these simple practices will help to create a joyful retirement.
Biography
Danny Bateman is an instructor at Concordia University of Edmonton in the Faculty of Education. He is a dynamic, engaging and entertaining presenter. Danny’s expertise comes from 34 years as an inclusive education teacher and consultant.
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