Do You Mind?

By Gipp Forster

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Have you ever heard someone say, "I've changed my mind"? How can a person change their mind? Changed it for what? A year's subscription to *Reader's Digest*? A dozen grapefruit? We can change our plans, our socks, even, at times, our desires, but we can't change our minds.

Or how about when someone moans, "I think I'm losing my mind"? Have you ever seen or heard of a lost-and-found for misplaced minds?

We can perhaps challenge our minds, can allow our minds to be put under severe pressure, even neglect to use them to their full potential, but we can't lose them. Even under extreme testing, the mind might shut down for a time, but it's still there – even if it's enjoying a holiday!

I said something to someone recently and they responded with, "Boy, that's a mindbender!" We can't bend our minds. I suppose we can stretch them a little, but not bend them. I sure wouldn't want to end up with a bent mind.

I have heard a group say, "We are all of one mind." Twelve or more people in a room with only one mind? That's scary! How about, "I have a mind to punch him in the nose." A mind can't punch anyone in the nose. But then, if it could, his mind might out-punch my mind. That would be really embarrassing. So, I’d better mind what I’m saying.

There are, of course, legitimate things we say about our or others’ minds: a “brilliant mind”; a “creative mind”; a “productive mind.” But when I hear someone say, “Wow, man, that blows my mind!” or “That’s mind blowing,” I get upset, especially when their heads don’t explode.

Ah, don’t mind me. I just had a mind to gripe about the mind for a while. I guess I should just be minding my own business; or minding my manners.

I think we should be able to purchase mind insurance, especially when our kids are maturing. If they flunk out of Grade 8 or 9; or dye their hair blue or purple or orange; or wear lip rings, tongue rings, nose rings and more earrings that they’ve already got – Wham! – Collect 10 grand for a defective mind that didn’t function properly in the first 14 or 15 years. I think that’s a great idea! I’m going to keep it in mind.

Once, I said, “I don’t mind…” and before I could finish my sentence, my wife said, “You’ve got that right!” I’m still trying to figure out what she meant. She refuses to tell me – she just said, “Never mind.” *Never* mind?

I don’t think we should be so loose-lipped about our minds. I don’t think we should be changing them or losing them or groups thinking with just one of them. I’ve a mind to write to our Prime Minister to be mindful of what’s going on around him. He probably wouldn’t pay it any mind though.

If you don’t mind, I think I’ll close now. My wife just said, “Good, now don’t go changing your mind.”
Oh boy, here we go again!

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